Question 1

If my mentee is struggling to talk, share, or open up, what things can I do?

Accepted Answer

This is such a great question! If this is the case, we recommend trying the following things:
 
1. Ask open-ended questions that require more than one-word answers. Sometimes your mentee won't know how to share or articulate what they're feeling perfectly, and they need your help to get them talking.
2. Share something vulnerable about your own story, and ask them follow-up questions about theirs. Mentees won't always feel safe taking the first step of vulnerability, but will likely mimic you if you're willing to do so.
3. Do something outside of the "mentoring" context. Take your mentee bowling, go see a movie, or grab a fun dinner. You may find it beneficial to spend non-mentoring time with them, and just have a good time together instead. It's possible that's exactly what your mentee needs to get over the hump.

Question 2

How should I handle my mentee sharing something vulnerable or sinful?

Accepted Answer

How you choose to handle the vulnerability of your mentee may be the single most important part of The Foundation. Here are tips for ways you can respond:
 
1. Always thank them for being willing to share heavy things with you. No matter how what they shared makes you feel, your mentee needs to know that it was safe to share with you and that you appreciate their transparency.
2. Be sure to remind your mentee that you love them. This is an amazing time to say things such as "I don't see you any differently," or "I respect you so much for sharing that with me." Oftentimes there is a great deal of shame attached to things that are difficult to share, and we always want to shower our mentees with grace in those moments.
3. If/when your mentee shares a sinful action or sin-struggle, don't try to fix it right away. In the moment, be sure to thank them for sharing and remind them how much you love them. Feel free to dig deeper into what they've shared, and ask them if they'd be willing to let you help them find freedom from their sin once you've listened well.

Question 3

If my mentee shares that they are being abused or considering self-harm, what should I do?

Accepted Answer

This is a great question, and one that we hope you never need to ask. However, in this fallen world these things do happen, and here is how you can handle it should you find yourself in this situation:
 
1. Thank your mentee for sharing. No matter how what they shared makes you feel, your mentee needs to know that it was safe to share with you and that you appreciate their transparency.
2. Remind them that they are safe with you. If they're being mistreated, or even mistreating themselves, they need to know that you are a safe person to talk with and that you deeply value who they are before God.
3. Don't promise complete confidentiality. Instead, let your mentee know that you will be reaching out to one of your local church pastors to discern together the best way forward, whether contacting the authorities, or pursuing some form of care for your mentee.

Question 4

What if I have a question that isn't addressed in the FAQs?

Accepted Answer

If you can't find the help you need in our FAQ section, you can always reach out with your question by clicking the "Contact" button below.

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